Wednesday, February 27, 2019

Maryjane & Barbara Ann

Maryjane is the oldest child of James and Mary Joseph, she is a good person, just feisty, non-conforming, outspoken, a great cook, generous and a strong believer in treating people fair and honest. She is not a gossip, a deceit monger, a smart aleck or a know-it-all just a natural born woman whom God made, from her perspective.  Barbara Ann is the youngest, she is the quintessential definition of a daughter from their mothers' perspective, their father once called her "strange".

Therefore, the two of  these sisters are not very close. They would have to agree to disagree on most things to get along.  The way life has dealt with them is quite opposite of each other.  The youngest, is employed for the establishment after many years, is now a wife with one child. The oldest, once a wife has three children, is very independent in employment, nothing permanent, but able to survive, by taking the advantage gained by way of the establishment and her built-in ferocity necessary to stay whole minded. She is totally against violence. Her mother called her "rude".

From the age of 14 Marjane has let it be know what she will and will not tolerate in every way. Barbara Ann, not a word, more of a go-along-with attitude.  Their mother prefers Barbara Ann. Why?
Because she herself is more of a go-along. She loves her children, but she bends over backwards for Barbara Ann and stands cemented against Maryjane. Barbara Ann is always right, she make good money so she is the better of the two, from her perspective. She is the one she regards as a perfect person because of her life. She is committed to be a part of the life of Barbara Ann. Maryjane is no more than a good cook, and neither her nor her children can be trusted.

Mind you, Maryjane has done nothing to anyone, she is so honest, she would admit it if she had. Barbara Ann, has many secrets, she shares them with no one, perhaps her husband depending on what and when. She is agreeable with him, on his perspective of others and life in general. She isn't too self-confident and believes she needs him to guide her. She has trouble defining or explaining to understand why she is how she is except, when it involves her big sister.

Her and her mother are armed and ready to attack Maryjane, behind her back and with others. The two of them together could never win against her to her face. Their attempts have failed, leaving them both defeated and scared. They set blockades and defenses that totally enable them to continue to look at her in a negative way, when they both look up to her.  They feel her life is one they could not handle as well as she does, but at the same time in a negative way,everything is her fault in her life.

If there was a billion dollars to be had, neither the mother nor Barbara Ann would  let on at all to Maryjane, not that she would care, but how it would help her tremendously. They keep secrets between the two of them. Their mother would prefer that Barbara Ann and her husband take the whole lot because she would be able to reap the benefits in her own way, selfishly and wasteful.  The both of them, because they can, shop and buy things they already have over and over again, when they have their use of them, or way too many of them, they offer them to Maryjane.  Maryjane often excepts, out of need and appreciation. There mother once said, We give Maryjane our junk.

Their minds are set that she is not on their level because she has not been dealt their hand in her life, yet she is still on top, she is not what they imagine she is in their minds, but that is how they treat her. She has forgiven them all these years for that, but they still expect her to eat their failure. She is good enough for that, but nothing more.

Sisters, they do love one another, inside. Their mother would rather have one over the other be her caretaker, when it comes to that, however, the hand of God is the ruler. When ever Barbara Ann tries to express compassion or concern for her big sister, their mother sabotages it, being negative, unsupportive, untrusting, it is hatred, straight out  for her first born and her grandchildren, but "she can cook a mean pot of greens". Barbara Ann is silenced and agrees with her Mom, "she sure can".

Tuesday, February 26, 2019

Sunday, February 24, 2019

FAMILY

via GIPHY


Family-The basic unit in society traditionally consisting of two parents rearing their children; also: any of various social units differing from but regarded as equivalent to the traditional family. A group consisting of parents and children living together in a household.
A race or group of peoples from a common stock. Synonyms: variety, stock, strain, line, family, type, kind, sort, class.


I know, I know, I shouldn't have started with Family, but I can't help it because, that is what everybody can relate to. Although some have not claimed it, don't know it, have come up without it as most of us know it, but at sometime somewhere in their lifetime, they certainly have used the word... right?  They, She, He is "like" Family or, We like family. 

Okay, how about this: All the descendants of a common ancestor. 
Synonyms: ancestry, parentage, birth, pedigree, genealogy, background, family tree, descendant, lineage, line of descendant, bloodline, race, strain, stock, breed, dynasty, house, forebears, forefathers, antecedents, progenitors, roots, origins. A group of people related to one another by blood or marriage because through marriage the children they birth will have blood from both parents and their families, wont if they don't have children together?  Then the families are more like "friends."  

"We can't turn him away, he is family. Blood relations, brother, sisters, aunt, uncle, cousin,  relatives, kinfolks, the breakdown goes even deeper and how you know where you stand can take on an identity that actually separates rather than bring together. Limits, "Don't be telling them my business when you go over their house for the holiday."   "Not my flesh and blood."


."Individually speaking, however I 'm not feeling the support. I can't deny the connection.  Isn't that what it means to us, some where with those who understand you , at best nearby, so you can run over ther just  to see them. It's like that, it's sad though when it's all really you can go there for, cause "You don't come by unless you want something."

That thing that bears the weight of something or keeps it upright, or together like: maintenance, "you must earn your keep", sustenance, subsistence, food, accommodation, contributions, backing, donations, money, subsidy, funding, funds, finance, capital, backing, help, assistance, aid, votes, endorsement, sanction, approval, blessing, patronage, advocacy, backing, promotion, championship, espousal, defense, recommendation, argument for, enable to function or act, suggest the truth of, corroborate.   


You don't call "unless you want something. "Of all of us and I mean ALL of us in this "family" need something, right? What, you got everything you need? Even with technology their is the support of a computer or operating system that allows the use of a program, computer language or device.

I have everyone convinced that... you ain't'..., you so..., you don't know what you talking about..., you talk can't keep a job..., Oh you can get one, but you can't keep it!you , you, you... that's  just ignorant! Where is support...in the form of family, well you name it, we know what we ain't got.  FAMILY. 



Sunday, February 17, 2019

WANT

They took our "want" from us, how do you do that ,we couldn't even want nothing!   Sam Cook wanted to help his people and all he "wanted" was his own record label and he was 33 years old when he was murdered for "wanting" something. The most we want for now is  a particular food dish , " I want some fish" I couldn't dare want something to change my lot in life, like my own business, my own home, something my heart truly desires for my family, for my people. This is the source of our inability to unite and it should be our one reason to unite.

They know this, yet they pretend they don't know what is "wrong" with us. When they are the cause of our ills. They are the ones who are not us, the ones who took us into this darkness, fear and misery to many lands from our homes, from our families, from everything, they took our "want" from us, even our want, they know who they are.

Not even being able to "want something". We have since managed to deal with a heavy heart, sad eyes, mad voices, and closed minds.   We are still here! and our "want" isn't gone. Our ability to keep putting our want on the back burner, pushing, and covering it until it becomes just a dream, not even that, not even a thought anymore, never a reality , but still there in there, and never forgotten, we just sort of say to ourselves and at times others, we good, until we need therapy. Denial is the same as lying.

We want to own our own homes, I want If you want and believe it can happen, even if you don't really know if you believe it can happen you still want it and you make effort to try and get it
and you look around and you don't have it, then it ain't you that's keeping it from happening, You know for sure it ain't you. We know it ain't us to blame for us not getting what we "want", someone else decides for us, that we can't have it, whatever it is, it could be the smallest, little thing, but you can't get it so why even "want" it. STOP, given the situations, we've faced them, we even learned to speak Spanish, we never give up, never. We got big Cojones. 

Saturday, February 16, 2019

Our Men

I believe our men are envied, by all other men. I think all women want our men not their own.
Women all over the world have admitted a strong attraction to our men over their own. Our men are the epitome of a man, a real man. A woman, who is not in denial feels like a piece of metal would feel being drawn to a magnet. Our men don't think about this they know it already. The woman is very powerful, all this talk about the woman having the power over the man because she is a woman does not apply in the case of power. Women want to relinquish power to a man who can handle it, and that's what they see in our men, someone who can take over and let us just be women.

Women want to be women they want a man who knows they are women and that understanding does not to be explained. If you understand this then you know what I mean and you know the other men are not on that level.

I notice how other men seem nervous when near our men. Now, I'm not saying all immediately send that vibe, but somewhere in their mind they are fighting the feeling that they are not what our men are. They know their women, deep down, want our men.
 

Thursday, February 14, 2019

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